L for everyone

so, i hate humans

i truly do, if i had a chance to kill every last one of them, i will do it. It's not a threat, it's just a plan, idk. i hate humans because they have ego, i hate it, they have purpose, they insist on their purpose. while other suffer, some happy, i hate to see other suffer, can we just end this world so no more suffering? 

a man had a chance to help others and they dont do it because "it's not that simple" SHUT UP. i want to see you try, give them what  you got, try. 

i write this because i don't have anyone to talk about this stuff

hi

i want to feel love, but from her, i want her, but she didn't even know me, i haven't met her before, i've never introduce myself to her and i want that to happen, i want her to know me, at least. 

i'm ok with lonely, but not with always lonely. 

i have a weird opinion about cheating. my dad cheat once, well i don't know the detail but now he did a polygamy, he marry another women, while still married to my mom. i'm scared that thing might happen to me in the future, because my grandparents, father of my dad, do polygamy, i'm scared it's like a heritage thing. i don't want to hurt my future wife. so, how i prepare to make that thing not happen is keeping my suicidal thought alive. so, if i cheat, then i'll kill myself and because i know i don't like to die by suicide, then the cheating never happen. 

i think this thing helps me, a little bit. but maybe i'll do it again another time. bye